You have no items in your cart. Want to get some nice things?
Go shopping
God, grant me the serenity…
Five words.
That’s as far as we’re going to get. Five words.
But GOOD GOLLY there’s a lot to unpack in these first five words.
For those of you unfamiliar with the Serenity Prayer, let me start with a tiny bit of background. It’s attributed to the American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr (1892–1971) but became best known when adopted by Alcoholics Anonymous in the early 1940s. Niebuhr, who the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1964, was a leading public intellectual for much of the early 20th century and wrote and spoke frequently about the intersection of religion, politics, and public policy. In response to the atrocities of World War II, he developed the philosophical perspective known as Christian realism, which maintained that, because of our fallen world and nature, we would never achieve perfection—or Christ-likeness—here on earth.
Now, full disclosure: I don’t know enough about Christian realism to critique it. What I do know, however, is that when I read this prayer and all the theology within, I think to myself, This man gets it.
This is not The Power of Positive Thinking. It’s not The Happiness Project. And it’s certainly not How to Change Your Life in the Next 15 Minutes. (Yes, that’s REALLY a book.) What it IS, is an earnest prayer by a man who understands that there are things in this world outside of our control but within the control of a God who takes these bumps and roadblocks and deep pits of our lives and transforms them—IF we allow him—into something of eternal worth and beauty. And THAT I can really get into.
Even if I don’t always fully know how to cooperate with him in the process.
So, shall we get started?
God.
This is where it begins. It is a prayer, after all.
But it also begins here, because he is the source of all that is to follow. All that is requested in this prayer can flow only from the one from whom we’ve made the request.
How hard is it for YOU to really live like you believe that?
Or is it only me?
I tend to bend toward achievement. I was the kid who said “I can do it my SELF.” Unless, of course, I didn’t want to do it. And if that was the case, chances were very good the object of my protest WAS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
So to be reminded, right off the bat, that this is NOT something I CAN DO MY SELF? It both frustrates me to no end AND relieves me a little bit AT THE SAME TIME. (I’m sure none of you can relate.)
Because that is, of course, why we are praying the prayer. We have not succeeded on our own. Like those who have found God’s mercy and healing through the Twelve Steps—those who likewise pray this prayer—we have come to a place of recognizing and admitting our powerlessness.
And we don’t like it.
But we love it.
But we hate it.
Isn’t that how it frequently goes? But God, in his graciousness, knows we struggle and therefore he continually reminds us: we’re not the ones who fix things. HE IS.
So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent. There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life. God’s Spirit beckons… Romans 8:12-14 MSG
The “do-it-yourself” life was something I excelled at for years. (Who am I kidding? I STILL excel at it. I just know now how to spiritualize my striving.) Find the right diet and the weight will take care of itself. Read the right book and remedy years of wrestling with chronic, low-grade depression. (Sounds a bit like a fever, doesn’t it?) Obtain the appropriate prescription and obliterate decades of chronic headaches in one long swallow. Learn your significant other’s love language and easily enjoy conflict-free living. Figure out the right combination of supplements and live a pain and illness free live.
The “do it yourself” life promises simplicity and a guarantee of success: find the formula, apply with a large dose of will-power, and expect the appropriate outcome.
Which would work great, were will-power unlimited and our lives, bodies, and relationships governed by algebraic formulas.
C.S. Lewis reminds us, however, why this approach is less than effective:
God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.
C.S. Lewis
It all begins with God. Not us. Not the people around us. Not the authors in whom we trust. Not the doctors. Not the pharmaceuticals, not the supplements, not the nutritionists, not even the COUNSELORS. gasp
SO… if we’re going to take an earnest look at this prayer, we have to each start with taking an earnest look at this first word. What IS your source?
And are you willing to cease your OWN striving in order to finally obtain what you’ve been unable to achieve despite all your best and well-intentioned efforts?
The choice is yours.
And there are times when it’s harder to make than you’d think.
GRANT.
God grant…
As someone who feels she must earn EVERYTHING, this next word “grant” is a GIFT. I’m not asking him to help me EARN serenity or manufacture it or force it to happen—I’m able to simply ask for him to give it to me.
As I’ve already established, this concept is somewhat foreign to me, still. I’ve learned over and again, usually the hard way, the truth penned by French philosopher Simone Weil,
In struggling against anguish one never produces serenity; the struggle against anguish only produces new forms of anguish.
Simone Weil
This is a poignant reminder, and one to which we ought to take heed: WE CANNOT PRODUCE SERENITY.
We cannot create TRANQUILITY through ongoing INTERNAL CONFLICT.
We cannot CALM OUR OWN STORMS.
We cannot FORCE PEACE.
There is, however and of course, much we CAN do:
We can cooperate with the Lord as he works it within us.
We can stop fighting his work in our lives and consent to his perfect plan. (More on that in the next post.)
We can learn, as we’ll also talk more about in our next post, the grace-filled mystery of receiving.
We can live in the truth articulated by American evangelist Dwight L. Moody,
A great many people are trying to make peace, but that has already been done. God has not left it for us to do; all we have to do is to enter into it.
Dwight L. Moody
And, more so than anything else, WE CAN ASK.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change…
You have not because you ask not. (James 4:2-3)
Ask and you will receive. (Matthew 7:7)
Make your requests known… (Philippians 4:6)
You want serenity?
Learn the second word.
GRANT.
Me.
God grant ME…
There are a million people in my life I’d like to fix for the express purpose of making my OWN life easier. I’m sure you can’t relate at all. AT. ALL. But this prayer is not for THEM to be changed.
It’s for ME to be changed.
That, alone, should keep us humble.
The entire content of this prayer and all the change inherent within comes down to this—We can’t do it on our own, and we can’t do it for anyone ELSE either. ONLY GOD CAN.
When we pray the Serenity Prayer, we stop looking not just for solutions but for scapegoats, as well.
[bctt tweet=”When we pray the Serenity Prayer, we stop looking not just for solutions but for scapegoats, as well.” username=”functionalish”]
Because you can only pray this prayer for yourself.
Lord, transform ME.
Lord, teach ME.
Lord, temper ME.
If you’re not willing to start in front of the mirror, then you’re not really willing to start.
And, finally…
Serenity.
God grant me the serenity…
This is where we begin in earnest—with our first request. What ought we ask for right off the bat?
We ought to ask for serenity. For that state of calm tranquility, that sense of being internally quiet and untroubled, the promise of being free and clear of storms, that condition of unruffled repose or quietude.
We ask for his PEACE.
Is it possible?
Of course it is.
If God be our God, He will give us peace in trouble. When there is a storm without, He will make peace within. The world can create trouble in peace, but God can create peace in trouble.
Thomas Watson
And because I love this quote so much and couldn’t bear not including it, here it this one, too:
Far below the surface of the ocean lie depths that are undisturbed by the fierce storms that rage above.
Father Jonathan Morris, The Way of Serenity
Depths that are undisturbed by the raging storms above.
What are they saying?
No matter the storm, peace is possible.
Why?
Because: JESUS.
One of my favorite books of all time—indeed, near the top of my OFFICIAL LIST—is Philip Keller’s A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23. If you struggle to recognize Christ’s tender care in your life, READ THS BOOK. Keller has this to say, in his chapter on “He Maketh Me to Lie Down in Green Pastures:”
The strange thing about sheep is that because of their very make-up it is almost impossible for them to lie down unless four requirements are met.
Owing to their timidity they refuse to lie down unless they are free of all fear.
Because of the social behavior within a flock sheep will not lie down unless they are free from friction with others of their kind.
If tormented by flies or parasites, sheep will not lie down. Only when free of these pests can they relax.
Lastly, sheep will not lie down as long as they feel in need of finding food.
It is significant that to be at rest there must be a divine sense of freedom from fear, tension, aggravations and hunger. The unique aspect of the picture is that it is only the sheepman himself who can provide release from these anxieties. (Emphasis mine.)
Philip Keller, A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23
Who is our “sheepman?”
The self-proclaimed Good Shepherd.
The one who tells us,
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30
When we cease our striving and ask the Lord to grant us serenity, we come out from under our yoke of self-sufficiency and stubborn sheep-ness and we allow him to make our very hearts lie down.
But the irony of this request, of course, is that God has in fact already made the first move toward us. We don’t have to beg for peace, because he gives it freely and eagerly.
The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace. Psalm 29:11
You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. Isaiah 26:3
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27
The Lord wants us to have peace because he IS PEACE.
And we begin by drawing near and asking.
As I close, I want to circle back to Matthew one last time, this time in The Message interpretation. Hear the words of the Good Shepherd as he asks this of YOU:
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11:28-30, MSG
God, grant me the serenity…
We can learn to live this way.
We CAN.
YOU can.
I can.
It starts when we respond to his words, Come to me, and we draw near with a prayer on our lips…
A prayer of humility.
A prayer of desperation.
A prayer of great wisdom.
A prayer for serenity.