You decide:

1. A pattern of negativistic, hostile, and defiant behavior lasting at least 6 months, during which four (or more) of the following are present:

• • often loses temper

• • often argues with adults

• • often actively defies or refuses to comply with adults’ requests or rules

• • often deliberately annoys people

• • often blames others for his or her mistakes or misbehavior

• • is often touchy or easily annoyed by others

• • is often angry and resentful

• is often spiteful or vindictive

Note: Consider a criterion met only if the behavior occurs more frequently than is typically observed in individuals of comparable age and developmental level (particularly those of your friends, family, neighbors, or complete strangers at the mall observing you with disdain as you navigate your screaming and flailing child out of the scrutinous public eye).

2. The disturbance in behavior causes clinically significant impairment in social, academic, or occupational functioning (the consequences of which include but are not limited to: getting beaten, sent to bed early, put in time out, removed from the table, removed from the room, removed from the premises, or removed from the family).

3. The behaviors do not occur exclusively during the course of a Psychotic or Mood Disorder (your own OR the child’s).

4. Criteria are not met for Conduct Disorder (kills dust bunnies, decapitates Barbies, steals Matchbox cars), and, if the individual is age 18 years or older, criteria are not met for Antisocial Personality Disorder (kills animals, decapitates classmates, steals cars).

Differential Diagnosis
Conduct Disorder; Mood Disorders; Psychotic Disorders; Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder; Mental Retardation; impaired language comprehension; typical feature of certain developmental stages. Also comorbid with Refusing To Eat Syndrome, Teasing the Sister Condition, Kicking and Screaming Fits, and Embarrassment of Parents in Public Disorder.

Your diagnosis?

family life humor motherhood raising boys