You may have noticed I’ve not been here for a few days. Then again, you may not have. I’ve noticed. I feel it somewhere in my chest, near my throat. Not quite the place where tears start to well up, but close. I am not quite right when I don’t get to write—I feel unsettled, as if everything is out of place. Or as if everything is IN place and it is actually I that is out of place.

This has been a week of misplaced things. I am pooped. My first child started first grade, which, I might add, makes six-and-a-half-year-old-girls EXTREMELY emotional. Oh my God, help me. This week she goes all day, every day. Bedtime will be early. Very early.

On top of that, our church has a quarterly worship service called Mosaic, which is put on by the Arts Ministry. We had one this Friday. Guess who coordinated it? If you guessed the-insane-woman-with-the-child-starting-first-grade-the-same-week, you were correct. The writer’s group I lead was featured, and it was a wonderful evening, although the preparations got a bit stressful. What was even more stressful was that, in addition to coordinating the evening, I worked on a project with my husband that put music and images to the Bearing Fruit poem I wrote. We’ve wanted to do something like this again for quite some time, but I have to be honest, as much as I adore my husband, I can kind of see why we don’t do it more often. Suffice it to say, it did not get started until Monday, and the service was on Friday. Pile on the fact that I worked extra hours this week (like as in 10 hours in one day, back to back), and you’re beginning to get a picture of my week. Finish it off with having to have a heart-breakingly difficult discussion tonight with some very good friends, and I’m pretty much done.

I’m a little fried. And a lot weary.

So I open up God Calling for August 25th, because I’m that far behind in my “daily” quiet time, and I read:

A breath of desire and My spirit is there—to replenish and renew. Sometimes weariness and exhaustion are not signs of lack of spirit but of the guiding of the Spirit.

Many wonderful things would not have happened but for the physical weariness, the mind-weariness of My servants, which made the resting apart, the giving up of work, a necessity…

Though My Way may seem a narrow way it yet leads to Life, abundant Life. Follow it. It is not so narrow but that I can tread it beside you.

I will follow the Spirit…

I just hope He leaves me some time to write about it.

family life motherhood overload reflection spiritual growth